I'm Perfect, You're Doomed
Tales from a Jehovah's Witness Upbringing
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3.4 • 7 Ratings
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- $18.99
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- $18.99
Publisher Description
I'm Perfect, You're Doomed is the story of Kyria Abrahams's coming-of-age as a Jehovah's Witness -- a doorbell-ringing "Pioneer of the Lord." Her childhood was haunted by the knowledge that her neighbors and schoolmates were doomed to die in an imminent fiery apocalypse; that Smurfs were evil; that just about anything you could buy at a yard sale was infested by demons; and that Ouija boards -- even if they were manufactured by Parker Brothers -- were portals to hell. Never mind how popular you are when you hand out the Watchtower instead of candy at Halloween.
When Abrahams turned eighteen, things got even stranger. That's when she found herself married to a man she didn't love, with adultery her only way out. "Disfellowshipped" and exiled from the only world she'd ever known, Abrahams realized that the only people who could save her were the very sinners she had prayed would be smitten by God's wrath.
Raucously funny, deeply unsettling, and written with scorching wit and deep compassion, I'm Perfect, You're Doomed explores the ironic absurdity of growing up believing that nothing matters because everything's about to be destroyed.
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
When Abrahams was growing up, her world was neatly divided between those who would live forever in a paradise on earth and all the "worldly" people her Jehovah's Witness family prayed for. Her congregation forbade Christmas and Halloween, aggressively shunned anyone who left the fold and taught children that birthday parties were of the devil. For kicks in her early teens, Abrahams would go witnessing door-to-door with her pal Lisa, a die-hard J-Dub. This acerbic, witty memoir chronicles the first 23 years of Abraham's life with candor and a good dose of comedy. Unlike other memoirs written by the disenchanted, Abrahams musters some affection for her decent but screwed-up family, and even for the religion itself. Where the story hits a rough patch is in her account of her late teens and early 20s, when she dropped out of high school; rushed into a disastrous teen marriage; fell into alcohol, drugs and adultery; and finally "fired Jehovah as personal bodyguard" and became an apostate divorc e. None of this is particularly funny, and Abrahams's tale of self-destruction ends abruptly enough that readers will wonder how she managed to pull herself together.
Customer Reviews
Love it
Super funny and very honest about the Jehovah witness religion! A must read
Very sad!
It's like reading from the view of an angry child. So disrespectful and untrue. Her personal life and experiences have nothing to do with the religion itself. I would not read again or tell anyone else to read, it's a sick display of ones personal objections to the witnesses themselves. Horrible just horrible. If you want to know anything about the witnesses you should ask one not read this hateful book! The title itself is so ridiculous. The witnesses don't think they are perfect they clearly state that they are not. And no one is doomed. That would imply they believed in destiny which they don't. It's just one big ball of crap! Dont waste your money