Falling in Love
Why We Choose the Lovers We Choose
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- $72.99
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- $72.99
Publisher Description
Falling in Love is the first book to unlock the mysteries of how and why we fall in love. Renowned psychologist Ayala Pines shows us why we fall for the people we do, and argues convincingly that we love neither by chance nor by accident. She offers sound advice for making the right choices when it comes to this complicated emotion. Packed with helpful suggestions for those seeking love and those already in it, this book is about love's many puzzles.
The second edition furthers the work of the popular and successful first edition. With expanded research, theory, and practice, this book once again provides one of a kind understandings of the experience of love. The new edition offers updated references to recent research, new chapter exercises, and "case examples" of romantic stories to begin each chapter.
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
Don't be fooled by the frothy pink jacket art: this is a dense, academic volume. It addresses every conceivable aspect of the psychology of mate selection in late 20th-century America, giving equal emphasis to social and clinical approaches to understanding romance. The book's first half is devoted to an ambitious and inclusive survey of the experimental literature on the general factors that influence attraction--for example, similarity, geographical proximity, physical beauty and social status. The second half underscores the relevance of early childhood experiences with and between one's parents in understanding one's attraction to specific persons. Recent clinical theories suggest that we are attracted to persons who are in some critical way similar to our parents and who have the potential to directly stimulate, and thus heal, old childhood wounds. Pines also offers advice to those seeking love. But she does a far better job of educating readers than advising them. Although founded in scientific evidence, her suggestions are brief and simplistic ("try to be in a good mood when you meet new people") and appear to have been tacked on to the end of each chapter simply to appeal to the self-help reader. Though Pine is at her best when laying out complex theories--accurately referring to the original research studies on which her assertions and conclusions are based--and the material is intellectually stimulating, reading it feels like work. Ten-city tour.