Unorthodox
The Scandalous Rejection of My Hasidic Roots
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4.2 • 152 Ratings
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- $14.99
Publisher Description
Now a Netflix original series!
Unorthodox is the bestselling memoir of a young Jewish woman’s escape from a religious sect, in the tradition of Ayaan Hirsi Ali’s Infidel and Carolyn Jessop’s Escape, featuring a new epilogue by the author.
As a member of the strictly religious Satmar sect of Hasidic Judaism, Deborah Feldman grew up under a code of relentlessly enforced customs governing everything from what she could wear and to whom she could speak to what she was allowed to read. Yet in spite of her repressive upbringing, Deborah grew into an independent-minded young woman whose stolen moments reading about the empowered literary characters of Jane Austen and Louisa May Alcott helped her to imagine an alternative way of life among the skyscrapers of Manhattan. Trapped as a teenager in a sexually and emotionally dysfunctional marriage to a man she barely knew, the tension between Deborah’s desires and her responsibilities as a good Satmar girl grew more explosive until she gave birth at nineteen and realized that, regardless of the obstacles, she would have to forge a path—for herself and her son—to happiness and freedom.
Remarkable and fascinating, this “sensitive and memorable coming-of-age story” (Pittsburgh Post-Gazette) is one you won’t be able to put down.
APPLE BOOKS REVIEW
Were you desperate to break free from your controlling family as a teenager? You should walk a mile in Deborah Feldman’s shoes. Her memoir—the inspiration for the popular streaming series of the same name—offers an intense and detailed account of her secretly rebellious, misfit life inside an extremely restrictive Hasidic Jewish home in Brooklyn. Feldman’s vivid and engrossing examination of ultra-Orthodox culture, beliefs and customs shows off an anthropologist’s attention to detail and a poet’s compassion. Despite her struggles, she manages to be both loving and scathing, to explore a range of emotions from anger to joy. One of the things that stuck with us was Feldman’s depiction of her arranged marriage at 17. She describes those years with such beautiful honesty and innocent bewilderment that we cheered when she musters the incredible courage to break free.
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
Born into the insular and exclusionary Hasidic community of Satmar in Brooklyn to a mentally disabled father and a mother who fled the sect, Feldman, as she recounts in this nicely written memoir, seemed doomed to be an outsider from the start. Raised by devout grandparents who forbade her to read in English, the ever-curious child craved books outside the synagogue teaching. Feldman's spark of rebellion started with sneaking off to the library and hiding paperback novels under her bed. Her boldest childhood revolution: she buys an English translation of the Talmud, which would otherwise be kept from her, so that she might understand the prayers and stories that are the fabric of her existence. At 17, hoping to be free of the scrutiny and gossip of her circle, she enters into an arranged marriage with a man she meets once before the wedding. Instead, having received no sex education from a culture that promotes procreation and repression simultaneously, she and her husband are unable to consummate the relationship for a year. The absence of a sex life and failure to produce a child dominate her life, with her family and in-laws supplying constant pressure. She starts to experience panic attacks and the stirrings of her final break with being Hasidic. It's when she finally does get pregnant and wants something more for her child that the full force of her uprising takes hold and she plots her escape. Feldman, who now attends Sarah Lawrence College, offers this engaging and at times gripping insight into Brooklyn's Hasidic community.
Customer Reviews
An exceptional and well written journey to freedom
This book had me totally enthralled, keeping me from other activities and reading until later than I should. An amazing story of one woman's young life and quest for freedom from a world that she felt shackled by. Beautifully written, insightful. Interesting, too, to see parallels that I experienced in a vastly different but still sectarian community. Highly recommended.
Unorthodox
A gripping and shocking autobiography. Highly recommend.
Heartbreaking yet inspirational
An amazing read which follows a young girls journey into womanhood. Should be compulsory reading for all girls off all ages and ethnicity. Proof that you can overcome anything in your life even if you believe it is your original fate. I hope it gives courage and determination to all who read. Deborah you have found your place in this world thank you for having the courage to do what you have done.
A must read.... Would give it 10/10 stars if possible