An Ordinary Age
Finding Your Way in a World That Expects Exceptional
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- $11.99
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- $11.99
Publisher Description
Best Book of 2021 —Esquire?
Featured on Good Morning America
"A meticulous cartography of how outer forces shape young people’s inner lives." —Esquire, Best Books of 2021
In conversation with young adults and experts alike, journalist Rainesford Stauffer explores how the incessant pursuit of a “best life” has put extraordinary pressure on young adults today, across our personal and professional lives—and how ordinary, meaningful experiences may instead be the foundation of a fulfilled and contented life.
Young adulthood: the time of our lives when, theoretically, anything can happen, and the pressure is on to make sure everything does. Social media has long been the scapegoat for a generation of unhappy young people, but perhaps the forces working beneath us—wage stagnation, student debt, perfectionism, and inflated costs of living—have a larger, more detrimental impact on the world we post to our feeds.
An Ordinary Age puts young adults at the center as Rainesford Stauffer examines our obsessive need to live and post our #bestlife, and the culture that has defined that life on narrow, and often unattainable, terms. From the now required slate of (often unpaid) internships, to the loneliness epidemic, to the stress of "finding yourself" through school, work, and hobbies—the world is demanding more of young people these days than ever before. And worse, it’s leaving little room for our generation to ask the big questions about who they want to be, and what makes a life feel meaningful.
Perhaps we’re losing sight of the things that fulfill us: strong relationships, real roots in a community, and the ability to question how we want our lives to look and feel, even when that’s different from what we see on the ‘Gram. Stauffer makes the case that many of our most formative young adult moments are the ordinary ones: finding our people and sticking with them, learning to care for ourselves on our own terms, and figuring out who we are when the other stuff—the GPAs, job titles, the filters—fall away.
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
In this middling work, journalist Stauffer covers predicaments and obstacles facing those in "emerging adulthood." The gig economy, school and medical debt, social media, and the prospect of an uncertain future, she writes, have led younger generations to believe they must be extra accomplished and rack up extraordinary experiences in order to live their "best life." The author convincingly connects economic instability with the feeling that every moment has to be productive and the burnout that inevitably results. These arguments are supported by research from experts, such as professor Mona Abo-Zena's findings on the prefrontal cortex and the "elaborative state" of early childhood when perfectionist notions are formed, as well as quotes from mostly 20-somethings, and the author's anecdotes about her social media obsession in her late teens and early 20s. The main solution offered is to find community with chosen families or focusing on the betterment of one's neighborhood. However, the writing becomes repetitive and something of a litany of grievance and despair: "So much of our hyperfocus on being exceptional, individualistic, and extraordinary was built on a foundation of lies: that all this would save us; that it would all be enough someday." Early adulthood may indeed be a grind, but reading about it shouldn't be.
