Be Not Afraid of Love
Lessons on Fear, Intimacy, and Connection
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5.0 • 1 Rating
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- $13.99
Publisher Description
“Radical and revolutionary.” —Jonny Sun, New York Times bestselling author of Goodbye, Again
A collection of powerful interconnected essays and affirmations that follow Mimi Zhu’s journey toward embodying and re-learning love after a violent romantic relationship, a stunning and provocative book that will guide and inspire readers to lean into love with softness
In their early twenties, Mimi Zhu was a survivor of intimate-partner abuse. This left them broken, in search of healing and ways to re-learn love. This work is a testament to the strength and adaptability all humans possess, a tribute to love. Be Not Afraid of Love explores the intersections of love and fear in self-esteem, friendship, family dynamics, and romantic relationships, and extends out to its effects on society and the greater political realm. In sharing their own intimate encounters with oppression, healing, joy, and community, Mimi invites readers to reflect deeply on their own experiences as well, with the intention of acting as a guide to undoing the hurt or uncertainty within them. In this heartrending and revolutionary book, Mimi reminds us, be not afraid of love.
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
Artist Zhu debuts with a harrowing memoir that probes the intersections of love, fear, and grief. They use insights from such thinkers as bell hooks, Audre Lorde, and Thich Nhat Han to dissect the physical, sexual, and emotional abuse they suffered from their partner, referred to as X, and lay out how they achieved self-compassion. The author loosely ties their emotional trajectory to the 10-stage Westberg model of grief and shares how they struggled with numbness, anger, and anxiety before reaching the later stages of "community" and "love." Recounting how X felt ashamed of his abusiveness while shaming Zhu into staying with him, Zhu likens shame to a ghost that must be confronted to be sapped of its power: "Running from our hauntings only intensifies their presence." Zhu describes how love and fear became "intertwined in a rapturous hypnotic dance" for them, and tells how a superficially mundane email from X led to a moment of clarity that enabled Zhu to let go of their feelings for him and realize that "we should sit with our fear and learn to love it too." The author's bracing candor and perceptive insights into the psyches of abusers and the abused make for an unflinching and heartening account of recovering from intimate partner violence. Powerful and unique, this offers a nuanced perspective on what it means to love others and oneself.
