Honey Don't
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- $4.99
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- $4.99
Publisher Description
Set in the very near future, Honey Don't features a hit list that runs the gamut: from a goatish president dying in flagrante, to an aging Don appalled by modern manners; from a certifiably stupid bagmen fleeing both the Secret Service and the mob with $656,000 of dirty money in a locked attaché case and the presidents head in a carry –all, to a coke-snorting blow-dried VP who has suddenly caught the brass ring. Circling them are conniving White House staffers, corrupt politicos, sleazy journalists, and rancid pro football coaches: in short, the usual D.C. three-ring circus.
And in the center ring is the eponymous Honey, one of those Texas women cursed with a given name that condemns her to a lifetime of cheerleading. But this Daddy's girl is a free spirit in full rebellion, and her take on life – offbeat but on target – is the heart and soul of this antic tale.
Honey Don't is a full frontal assault on the inanities of our age. Often outrageous, sometimes shocking, always wickedly funny, it is, in the end, utterly and slyly subversive. It is also Tim Sandlin at his most maverick best.
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
Strongly reminiscent of Carl Hiaasen and Tom Robbins, this sixth satirical novel by the ribald, irreverent Sandlin takes leave of GroVont, Wyo. (setting of Sandlin's GroVont trilogy), to visit a mismatched cast of oddball denizens of Washington, D.C. Returning in the wee hours of the morning from a botched assignment in Europe, Daily News journalist RC Nash shares a cab from Dulles Airport with Jimmy Sebastiano, a dim-witted Mafia bagman couriering $656,000 to his boss, Rat's Ass Olivetti, the godfather of Philadelphia. Jimmy sneaks into his Foggy Bottom pad the back way to avoid two federal agents parked out front and catches his mistress, ex-Texas high school cheerleader Honey DuPont, having sex with the president. The startled president trips on his thong bikini and dies instantly when he strikes his head on an ornamental iron flamingo. Sneaking the corpse out in a beanbag chair, they take it to the house of Honey's ex high school flame, Farlow Stubbs, a gay Redskins defensive back, and put it in his freezer. Looking to land an interview with Farlow, RC stumbles upon the corpse; meanwhile, Mafia hit men come looking for Jimmy, who still has the mob's money. Wacky subplots feature a pubertal grandson of the Mafia boss who has a crush on Honey; the ex-first lady (a former Jazzercise instructor from Wisconsin); the devious White House chief of staff; the boneheaded v-p (now president); a cadre of assorted Feds; RC's former editor; her lover (an adulterous senator); and a cast of other Washington types caught up in the zany chase. This madcap farce is a surefire bet to have readers laughing out loud. 8-city author tour.