LIFE WITH DANIEL

One day in September 1997 Daniel moved in. Daniel unpacked his socks and underpants as he placed them in his new set of drawers in his brand new bedroom. Since that day he has never put one item of clothes away. I became keeper of his clothes, stomach, emotions and goldfish.


Like every new mum I was proud of my eight-year-old son. I wanted to show him off. Daniel was warmly welcomed into my world by a league of friends and family. They came bearing gifts and the words "has he settled in yet?" and "Does he like school?" - Of course he settled in. He had unpacked his pants.


Daniel did like school. He took the education system by the throat, swallowed it whole and spat it out. The education system could not spit as far as Daniel. Daniel was more experienced.


The first teacher decided to dedicate her life to him. She was acutely aware of the schools policy on working in partnership with parents. She ignored Daniel and concentrated on me. I still miss her.


Daniel's next teacher knew everything about behavior management. He knew nothing about Daniel. Daniel knew everything about him. People who live up their own arse shouldn't teach children. This is not the Ofsted Standard, it is Daniel's Standard.


Daniel's last teacher at primary school was a man of many words. I could not understand most of them. I had problems with his speech. Daniel did not. He tried hard to communicate effectively with him and he was richly rewarded. Daniel told his teacher to "Luck off". He spent the rest of the year sitting outside the staff room. They both loved it.


Daniel's first comprehensive school is the nearest that one will get to a debtors prison. My initial visit confirmed that it was full of sex and drugs. The toilets were dirty. There was an inner sanctum where the head teacher lived. From the round window she surveyed all that was in her power. She was a chubby women dressed in a tight black top and a red skirt with matching nail varnish and lipstick. She called herself "Viv". Daniel called her a tart and he was suspended for two days.


I have travelled with Daniel along the skid row of education. I have encountered teachers good and bad, ones who cared and ones who did not and ones who did not know how to. I have seen their enthusiasm change to despair and their support change to blame. I have even seen one who needed a good wash. I have never seen one who understood.


Except, perhaps, one, the head of the local "sin-bin". Daniel ended up there. He knew that he would, he had been told often enough. At our first meeting I was giving him the grand tour around Daniel's past. I had just reached the point where Daniel had moved in with us four years previously when the teacher looked at me and said "Has he settled in yet?".