Scoring Position (Short Story‪)‬

Ryan says that 1974 marked the beginning of the end of Western civilization. That was the year that "dysfunction" entered the English lexicon, first as a term by some third-rate psychologist, and then marketing people got hold of the word. Eventually, someone figured out that it was easier to sell people products--especially to men--if you could tell them that their equipment was dysfunctioning. They wouldn't listen to you if you told them it was malfunctioning. That's what Ryan says. He has theories about everything. Don't ask him who killed the Kennedys, or about UFOs. Whatever you do, don't ask him questions like this if you're one of his clients and on the clock. He charges one hundred thirty-five dollars an hour. I don't agree with Ryan about 1974. I tell him that his mind is dysfunctioning, and I laugh when I tell him, usually after a few beers. I don't much give a damn about conspiracy theories, though I've conspired on occasion.