Eight Lessons for a Happier Marriage

PUBLISHERS WEEKLY 7 MAY 2007

Psychiatrist William Glasser, founder of an eponymous institute, and his wife, Carleen, who teaches relationship workshops there, follow earlier relationship books (Getting Together and Staying Together) by laying out the secrets to a happy marriage through what they refer to as choice theory, a simple enough, commonsense theory based on the premise that every action and reaction is a personal choice and can therefore be controlled. Many of the Glassers' tips are mere rehashings of what other books on the market already have to offer. The Glassers list the Seven Deadly Habits of marriage (criticism, blaming, complaining, nagging, threatening, punishing and bribing) and recommend replacing them with positive habits like supporting and encouraging. Another concept the authors introduce is the "quality world," which is defined as "a feel good world created from our own most pleasurable feelings." It's necessary to know and negotiate around each other's quality worlds (he likes wine with dinner; she abhors it). At a mere 112 pages, this is a quick read, and the comics and case studies at the beginning of each chapter aid in illustrating the lessons in a way that makes them even easier to understand.