ON THE VERGE

Twenty-three-year-old Jersey girl Eve Vitali is on the verge of something...whether it be a relationship, the fabulous life that she reads about in the Styles section of the New York Times or a nervous breakdown. Despite her Jackie O. suit, Eve works as an unappreciated assistant for—of all things—a bicycle magazine. Everyone keeps telling her that she's got her foot in the door, but the rest of her is surfing the Net and schlepping around with Tabitha, an Amazonian sex goddess. Between glam parties, obligatory visits home and myriad men, Eve is realizing that it takes a lot of work to get beyond the verge and on to the next big thing....

It seems everyone has advice on how to get there:

Eve (on keeping her "foot in the door"): "Develop artificial cheeriness. Answer all requests with 'great.'

Hypothetical: Person of dubious authority: 'Eve, why don't you count all of the paper clips in the entire department and then divide them into seven equal piles?' Me: 'Great. I'll get right on it. That'll be great.'"

Tabitha (prefers foreign men, gets entree to the coolest parties, buys lots of underwear): "Remove unsightly hairs before all dates."

Roseanne (Eve's roommate who works in—gasp!—finance): "Whatever you do, don't be predictable."