Training My Human

So it turns out dragons are real.

I never suspected the lava rock I threw into the firepit was actually an egg. I'm blown away when it hatches to reveal a reptile with a voracious appetite. Cute little bugger, until it learns to talk.

The bossy critter thinks he can order me around. Claims he's a dragon. Says when he grows strong enough, he wants to rule the world. I say go ahead. He can't do any worse than our current politicians.

However, his plans for planetary domination have hit a slight snag. Seems my little fella—who grumbles that I'm not honoring him properly—is wanted by the government. Or so the goons that show up on my property claim. I have my doubts as to their identities. Even if they're telling the truth, I'm not about to hand over my new pet, but how's a woman who inks tattoos for a living supposed to keep a dragon safe? The local pet shop owner—hunky, plaid-wearing Maddox—has a few ideas, but my little dragon isn't keen on running.

Can I keep my dragon out of the clutches of those who'd steal him for personal gain? And if we do have to flee, will Maddox come too? I need all the help I can get with figuring out life with the lizard. 

* 

Humans. Bah. They've gotten uppity since my maternal progenitor conceived my egg. It will take much training before the female I've commandeered is suitable for service.

So much for her to learn, starting with proper meals. She tried to feed me bugs as if I were a simple lizard! Then she dared to abandon me so she could work—incentive for me to build my hoard so she can devote her time fully to me. I've allowed her distraction with the male, but only because he will serve me too, and sooner than he thinks, since my enemies are already closing in.

But they'll learn a dragon, even one newly hatched, is a force to be reckoned with, and if you mess with those I've claimed, you will face my wrath!