Two Croaks but no Frogs

Two Quick Flash stories about croaks which have nothing to do with frogs, but a few snook in from the Boggy Swamps of imagination land. The stories are in MY Friction style. That means factual, but with a decent helping of fiction.
Both stories are about death, or ‘croaking’ … the frogs therefore made a mistake, but they aren’t very clever so I can forgive them and even afford them a moment of fame.
But anyway, I/we hope you enjoy the tales.
I’ve decided, as I now have a few specimens to enable me to easily become either a scientist and test legal highs on these frogs, or a dealer in frogs legs to Monica Galetti, so if you would like several (we’re low on stock at the moment, we have 3) don’t hesitate to send your payment with your order. Each leg (and we’re including the front ones) is $120 each and we’re doing a BTGTLOF deal (Buy Three Get The Last One Free).
Enjoy the stories, they’re both basically true especially My Mother’s Brain. The first one, set in Egypt could actually happen as the stage is set and one only has to know what some men are like.