Rock Bottom Girl: A Small Town Romantic Comedy (Unabridged‪)‬

"You may be faking the relationship, but you're not faking the orgasms."  

Downsized, broke, and dumped, 38-year-old Marley sneaks home to her childhood bedroom in the town she couldn't wait to escape 20 years ago. Not much has changed in Culpepper. The cool kids are still cool. Now they just own car dealerships and live in McMansions next door. Oh, and the whole town is still talking about that Homecoming she ruined her senior year.  

Desperate for a new start, Marley accepts a temporary teaching position. Can the girl banned from all future Culpepper High Homecomings keep the losing-est girls soccer team in school history from killing each other and prevent carpal tunnel in a bunch of phone-clutching gym class students?  

Maybe with the help of Jake Weston, high school bad boy turned sexy good guy. When the school rumor mill sends Marley to the principal's office to sign an ethics contract, the tattooed track coach, dog dad, and teacher of the year becomes her new fake boyfriend and alibi - for a price. The Deal: He'll teach her how to coach if she teaches him how to be in a relationship.  

Who knew a fake boyfriend could deliver such real orgasms? But it's all temporary. The guy. The job. The team. There's too much history. Rock bottom can't turn into a foundation for happily ever after. Can it?  

Warning: Story also includes a meet-puke, a bouffanted nemesis, a yard swan and donkey basketball, a teenage-orchestrated makeover, and a fake relationship that gets a little too real between the sheets.