The Apple Store Job Fair (Essay‪)‬

If you're ever invited to attend the Apple Store Job Fair at the Cupertino headquarters, don't drink the water. The employees pushing the cold bottles of water are store managers. If you find yourself with an urgent need to urinate during the two-hour presentation and activity session, don't use the restroom. You will piss away your job interview if you do.

An original 8,300-word essay being published for the first time.