"Fantastic... Stefanie's practical, informative, inspiring and highly-accessible approach to addressing psychological phenomena makes this book a hit" -- Vex King, bestselling author of Good Vibes, Good Life
"I adored this book! Both mind-expanding and easy to digest, it is extremely helpful to me as a person, partner, mother and writer and my life is definitely better -- brighter, more enjoyable, less dominated by fear -- for having read it" -- Cathy Rentzenbrink, author of The Last Act of Love
The breakthrough million-copy international bestseller about how to find happiness by befriending your inner child
Everyone longs to be accepted and loved. Ideally, during childhood, we develop the self-confidence and sense of trust that will help us through life as adults. But the traumas that we experience in childhood also unconsciously shape and determine our entire approach to life as adults.
In The Child In You, bestselling author and psychologist Stefanie Stahl shares her proven approach for working with - and befriending - our inner child. Powerful, imaginative and practical - with clever exercises, from the three positions of perception to over-writing old memories - she shows how by renouncing our 'shadow child' and embracing our 'sun child,' we can learn to resolve conflicts, form better relationships, and find the answer to (almost) any problem.
"I thoroughly recommend The Child In You, which will help anyone who wants to improve their mental wellbeing. We should all know our inner child, and Stefanie Stahl shows how we can get to do so, exploring this concept with warmth and accessibility" -- Julia Samuel, author of Grief Works and This Too Shall Pass
German clinical psychologist Stahl (Yes, No, Maybe) uses the metaphor of the inner child to help readers work through formative childhood experiences in this compassionate work. She proposes that the inner child is an unconscious part of one's personality defined in childhood, which is split between the "shadow child" (feelings of helplessness that inspire defense mechanisms and self-protection) and the "sun child," (feelings of love and protection that inspire self-esteem) and is often in conflict with one's "inner adult," or "our rational and reasonable mind." As people try to secure the four basic psychological needs of connection, autonomy, pleasure, and avoidance of displeasure, Stahl posits, the shadow child's negative beliefs lead to self-protection strategies that result in perfectionism, overadjustment, conflict avoidance, and other negative habits. To heal the shadow child, Stahl recommends reinforcing one's sun child and inner adult through self-reflection, rational analysis, and speaking to oneself as the shadow child. Stahl argues that one is "100 percent responsible" for one's own happiness, and that happiness must be attained through dismantling negative self-defense mechanisms and cultivating one's ability to live in the moment. Readers of psychology or self-help will be enlightened by this straightforward, intuitive, and sensitive investigation.