The Sistren Code: Light Your Candle First

You cannot light another candle with a flame you do not have

Every woman knows how to give until there is nothing left of her. The Sistren Code is the older-sister voice that finally gives you permission to stop and to light your own candle first.

Part testimony, part Scripture, and woven throughout with the proverbs of the Akan, this is a warm, honest guide to self-love that never asks you to love others less. Across five movements, it walks you home to yourself:

•Light Your Own Candle — develop yourself first; you cannot pour from an empty cup
•Guard Your Flame — the holy "no," and the wisdom to know what to water
•Choose Who Warms You — recognising the love that lifts you, and leaving what makes you small
•Tend the Sacred Flame — hearing God firsthand, pouring out your pain, and the joy of relying on Him
•Keep the Lamp Trimmed — saving, living within your means, and refusing to be made small

Written by Selina Kunadu-Yiadom, PhD, for her two daughters and for every woman learning that protecting her peace is not selfishness, it is the only honest way to give.

If you have ever poured yourself out for people who forgot every sacrifice… if you have ever been made to feel beneath someone you lifted… if you are ready to fill your own cup so that what you give finally flows from fullness — this book was written for you.

Light your candle first. The room can wait.