Seven Things Not to Do When Everyone's Trying to Kill You

Being a wizard is hazardous to your health.

Things not to do when being tracked by murderers:

#1 Do not drag the girl you’re in love with into your deadly mess.

#2 Do not accept a bag full of money.

#3 If you do accept said bag of money, don’t be dumb enough to shove it down the back of your pants.

#4 Do not get into a battle with the evil lunch lady.

#5 Do not start a war in a tourist hotspot.

#6 Do not let your dad find out you’re a wizard.

#7 Do NOT under any circumstances, no matter how desperate things might seem, let Eric Deldridge convince you to break into the Library and seize control of the magical world.