Share the mental load, rebalance your relationship and transform your life
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER
"A hands-on, real talk guide for navigating the hot-button issues that so many families struggle with" - Reese Witherspoon
Do you find yourself taking on the lion's share of all the thankless, invisible but time-consuming work in the home? FAIR PLAY is the first book that shows you that there can be a different way: a way to get more done, with less fuss, in a way that feels more balanced.
Eve Rodsky is changing society one relationship at a time, by coming up with a 21st-century solution to an age-old problem: women shouldering the brunt of domestic responsibilities, the mental load, the emotional labour. Everything that is required to keep the fridge full, the children's homework in their bags, and the household running. The unequal division of all this invisible work in relationships is a recipe for disaster, but no one has offered a real solution to this dilemma, until now.
Eve Rodsky was tired of always being the one who has to remember to buy loo roll, or to book the family's dentist appointments, or to send the thank you cards - all while working full time. So Eve decided to do what she does every day as an organisational management consultant: Organise. She conducted original research with more than 500 couples to figure out WHAT the invisible work in a family actually is and HOW to get it done effectively and all in a way that makes relationships even stronger. FAIR PLAY identifies the 100 main tasks in any relationship, and then divides those tasks fairly (not necessarily equally) so that both parties contribute their fair share.
If we don't learn to rebalance our home life and reclaim some time to develop the skills and passions that keep us unique, then we risk losing our right to be interesting, not just to our partner, but to ourselves. Getting this right isn't a luxury, it's a necessity for a happy, lasting partnership. Part how-to guide for couples, part modern relationship manifesto, FAIR PLAY offers an innovative system with a completely original lexicon to discuss how relationships actually work ... and how we can make them work better.
Rodsky, founder of the Philanthropy Advisory Group, tackles in her impressive debut the unequal standards for housework for women who perform many "unpaid, invisible" tasks in the home. A text from Rodsky's husband about blueberries forgotten during the weekly shopping trip prompted her to ask for more help from him and eventually to come up with a "fair play" system for women who work full time (like their partners), but are also responsible for the lion's share of home and child management. Broken down into four tenets all time is created equal, reclaim your right to be interesting, start where you are now, and establish your own standards her system came together from her research of domestic inequality and interviews with over 500 couples. To facilitate fair divvying up of responsibilities, Rodsky also provides 100 Cards of Fair Play, which represent the most common tasks in the home ecosystem, as well as sample calenders and discussion questions to help couples implement her rules. Couples searching for ways to better manage their families and achieve a balance of domestic work will benefit from Rodsky's actionable strategy.