The Dark Lord's Assistant

This is an Apple Books audiobook narrated by a digital voice based on a human narrator.

Golgoth wants to conquer the kitchen. The Guild wants him to conquer the world.

Being a Dark Lord is hard work. The hours are long, the cape chafes, and the screaming villagers ruin the ambiance.

Golgoth the World Strangler is bad at being bad. He's much better at roasting chicken than roasting heroes. But when the Agency sends him Wenlic—a sharp-tongued assistant with a mysterious past—his quiet life of culinary escapism is over.

Now, caught between a corporate evil empire and a past that won't stay buried, the green-skinned giant and his tiny assistant must team up to save their skins.

Douglas Adams meets Shrek in this hilarious fantasy adventure about finding your passion, fighting the system, and cooking the perfect dinner.