The Ambivalent Daughter

A compelling memoir of a mother and daughter struggling to adjust to new circumstances after the mother has a severe stroke. Suddenly Bethanie must assume responsibility for the care of her octogenarian mother who has become completely disabled. Bethanie and her mother, Gertrude, have never gotten along which complicates matters. They are both strong independent women. Gertrude requires total care and moves to a nursing home near her daughter. Bethanie must juggle her career, her mother's medical and emotion needs, and her marriage. She visits her mother daily to keep her spirits up and oversee her care. She begins to show signs of stress and depression. She notices problems in the nursing home care and becomes a fervent advocate for her mother. She insists that care include consideration for her mother's emotional needs as well as her medical needs. The heart of the book is the interaction between the mother and daughter, both of whom want to be loved, appreciated, and understood by the other one. The mother's stroke and subsequent nursing home life become catalysts for positive changes in their relationship. Adult children caring for their aging parents will identify with this poignant story.