Being Dead Is No Excuse

"[A] lifelong Southerner . . . exposes the culinary and cultural last rites of the deep South . . . as sidesplitting as it is politically incorrect." —Publishers Weekly, starred review

A hilarious guide to the intricate rituals, customs, and etiquette surrounding death in the South-and a practical collection of recipes for the final send-off.


As author and southerner Gayden Metcalfe assert that people in the Delta have a strong sense of community, and being dead is no impediment to belonging to it. Down south, they don't forget you when you've up and died—they may even like you better and visit you more often! But just as there is an appropriate way to live your life in the South, there is a tasteful way of departing it. The funeral is the final social event of your existence so it must be handled flawlessly.


Gayden Metcalfe, native of Greenville, MS, is steeped in the stories and traditions of this rich region. She reminisces about the prominent family that drank too much and got the munchies the night before the big event—and left not a crumb for the funeral. Then there was the lady who allocated money to have "Home on the Range" sung at the service, and the family that insisted on a portrait of their mother in her casket.


Each chapter ends with an authentic southern recipe that will come in handy if you "plan to die tastefully", including Boiled Bourbon Custard; Aunt Hebe's Coconut Cake; Pickled Shrimp; Homemade Mayonnaise; and Homemade Rolls.


"Sure to have Southern hostesses nodding their perfectly coiffed heads in unison." —USA Today

"If you want a good laugh . . . pick up a copy." —Washington Post