Boys & Sex

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER

Now in paperback—Peggy Orenstein, author of the groundbreaking New York Times bestseller Girls & Sex, turns her focus to the sexual lives of young men. “Eye-opening…. Every few pages, the boy world cracks open a little bit…. Even in the most anxiety-provoking moments of Boys & Sex, it’s clear that Orenstein believes in the goodness of boys and the men they can become, and she believes in us, as parents, to raise them” (New York Times Book Review).

Peggy Orenstein’s Girls & Sex broke ground, shattered taboos, and launched a timely and urgent conversation about #MeToo, pleasure, and agency in sexual encounters. It also had an unexpected effect on its author: Orenstein realized that talking about girls is only half the conversation. Boys are subject to the same cultural forces as girls—steeped in the same distorted media images and binary stereotypes of female sexiness and toxic masculinity—which equally affect how they navigate sexual and emotional relationships. In Boys & Sex, Peggy Orenstein dives back into the lives of young people to once again give voice to the unspoken, revealing how young men understand and negotiate the new rules of physical and emotional intimacy.

Drawing on comprehensive interviews with young men, psychologists, academics, and experts in the field, Boys & Sex dissects so-called locker room talk; how the word “hilarious” robs boys of empathy; pornography as the new sex education; boys’ understanding of hookup culture and consent; and their experience as both victims and perpetrators of sexual violence. By surfacing young men’s experience in all its complexity, Orenstein is able to unravel the hidden truths, hard lessons, and important realities of young male sexuality in today’s world. The result is a provocative and paradigm-shifting work that offers a much-needed vision for raising boys to become better men.

This essential guide for parents, educators, and young people themselves unpacks the most pressing issues boys face today:
Locker Room Talk: Go beyond the headlines to understand the cultural forces that shape how boys think about and discuss sex, women, and their own emotions.The New Sex Education: Discover how unprecedented access to pornography is shaping young men’s expectations around performance, pleasure, and partnership.Hookup Culture and Consent: Hear directly from boys as they navigate the new rules of intimacy, from casual encounters to their complex understanding of consent in the #MeToo era.Raising Better Men: Unravel the hidden truths and hard lessons of male sexuality to find a much-needed vision for how we can guide boys toward a healthier, more empathetic future.