Little Gems

Young children are nothing if not honest, and their honesty is invariably disarming and comical. Who better to discover their innermost thoughts than bestselling author and former school inspector Gervase Phinn? From his lifetime of school visits, and talking to parents and grandparents, Gervase has put together a delightful compilation of children's wise words, insightful observations on life and their amusing comments about others. Such as:


'Grandma, your face needs ironing!'


'The nativity play's off, Miss — the Virgin Mary's got nits.'


'When you're dead, Grandpa, can I have your watch?'


'Mummy, Mummy, my caterpillars in the jar on the windowsill are turning into Christians.'


'My Daddy says my Grannie's past her sell-by date.'


'Mummy, what does God stand on? Perhaps it's a hard cloud.'


'Granddad,we've been asked to take something very very old into school. Will you come in with me tomorrow?'


Young child just before saying his prayers: 'I'm sick of talking to God with my eyes closed.'