The Thing You Most Wanted

"A heart-bending triumph of a novel, and a staggering work of emotional suspense. I couldn’t put it down and wasn’t ready to leave it at the end. Laura Spence-Ash is one of our best writers."
— Patrick Ryan, New York Times bestselling author of Buckeye

The richly perceptive and moving story of a love held in secret and carried over the course of one woman’s life—a novel that explores what devotion asks us to surrender by brilliantly recentering the iconic dilemma at the heart of Wharton’s classic The Age of Innocence, from the celebrated author of Beyond That, the Sea.

Virginia Bowman has kept a secret for decades, one that has come to define her life.

She’s settled into a comfortable routine when news of her daughter’s engagement finally calls her to face the past, to confront the choices she made more than three decades ago.

In 1960s New York, Virginia is a recent transplant from New Jersey climbing the ladder in the world of television broadcasting—newly engaged to Don Welland, son of one of the city's established families, her ambitions finally finding purchase.

Then, on the night of the Metropolitan Opera's spectacular opening, she meets Don's cousin: Leonard Welland, an independent and unconventional painter. An outlier in his own family, entirely out of place on the plaza in his jeans and fringed suede jacket. It’s a moment Virginia knows she won’t forget even as she’s living it.

As Virginia settles into marriage and all that being a wife and Welland entails, what passes between her and Len becomes the secret at the center of everything—a choice she makes quietly, completely, and a story she carries through decades of an outwardly enviable life. Until a long deferred trip unexpectedly opens a door.

Written a century after the beloved classic that serves as its inspiration, The Thing You Most Wanted takes on the progress and contradictions inherent to a bygone era of New York, with echoes of our own time. Spence-Ash writes with grace and insight about class and money; desire and power; and where love might still thrive amidst it all.

"Laura Spence-Ash points her discerning gaze at a world of privilege in New York in the 1960s, and the result is intoxicating. The social-political machinations, the unforgettable grandmother who maneuvers her family like chess pieces, and Virginia’s arrival at a pivotal moment that will define both herself and her life, make this book impossible to put down."
— Ann Napolitano, New York Times bestselling author of Hello Beautiful