My home is my sanctuary. Or is it my prison? Some days it's hard to tell.
I've confined myself behind these walls for protection. I have my reasons, but that doesn't change the profound loneliness I've discovered in the process.
Then one day I find myself drifting toward the window to see him. Corey Marshall, my new neighbor. Quiet, reserved, and cute as can be. He infects my thoughts, becomes the image I fantasize about.
I want to taste his lips, smell his scent...feel what it's like to be inside him.
And soon, watching becomes exchanging gifts and messages, which becomes so much more.
It's wrong to want this as badly as I do, but I can't help myself. I crave him so desperately. It's hard to tell if what we're doing is going to make me lose my mind or change my entire world, but it's too late to turn back now....
I've never been quite right. Too high or too low. Pain is my constant companion...at the hands of my abusive ex, and often from myself. The sweet relief is only temporary, but in those moments, it's like I can finally breathe.
Then I meet him. Silas Rizner calms the chaotic storms inside me. He makes me feel loved, treasured, even when I don't deserve it. I cherish the moments we share - cooking, cuddling, and when Silas reads to me until I fall asleep. When he's inside me, it's the only time in my life I've ever felt complete.
Silas becomes the glue that holds me together, that bandages my scars. Inside the walls of his home, we're almost safe, but our demons are always there, waiting to break free.
We're a mess. We're broken, chaotic, beautiful; we're in love.
But not even love can slay our monsters. No, only we can do that.
Unless our monsters destroy us first.
TRIGGERS: Self-harm, depression, anxiety, mentions of past domestic violence.
*While the sexual situations depicted in Beautiful Chaos are imperative to the characters' development throughout the course of the novel, listeners are advised to hear the "Dear Reader" letter at the beginning of the book to help them make an informed decision about whether this particular story will be to their tastes.