He’s Just Not That Into You—based on a popular episode of Sex and the City—is tough love advice for otherwise smart women on how to tell when a guy just doesn’t like them enough, so they can stop wasting time making excuses for a dead-end relationship. It’s the best relationship advice you’ll ever receive.
For ages, women have come together over coffee, cocktails, or late-night phone chats to analyze the puzzling behavior of men.
He’s afraid to get hurt again.
Maybe he doesn’t want to ruin the friendship.
Maybe he’s intimidated by me.
He just got out of a relationship.
Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo are here to say that—despite good intentions—you’re wasting your time. Men are not complicated, although they’d like you to think they are. And there are no mixed messages.
The truth may be, He’s just not that into you.
Unfortunately, guys are too terrified to ever directly tell a woman, “You're not the one.” But their actions absolutely show how they feel.
Reexamining familiar scenarios and classic mindsets that keep us in unsatisfying relationships, Behrendt and Tuccillo’s wise and wry understanding of the sexes spares women hours of waiting by the phone, obsessing over the details with sympathetic girlfriends, and hoping his mixed messages really mean, “I’m in love with you and want to be with you.”
He’s Just Not That Into You is provocative, hilarious, and, above all, intoxicatingly liberating. It deserves a place on every woman’s night table. It knows you’re a beautiful, smart, funny woman who deserves better. The next time you feel the need to start “figuring him out,” consider the glorious thought that maybe, He’s just not that into you. And then set yourself loose to go find the one who is.
Not depressing at all
I just got out of a confusing relationship and I wanted to read this but worried it would make me depressed. It had the opposite effect- it's information you already know at least subconsciously, but it's like a great pep talk from friends giving it to you straight. It helped me stop wanting to call and ask why, or where did I misstep, or why did you say this and act like this. It helped me get to the point where it didn't even matter and I didn't want to waste my time.
The authors seem to think all women are the same.
This is a great book. They bring out a lot of good points any woman would do good to remember.
That said, I am already seeing a few unsettling trends: this book assumes all women are the same. That they jump into bed with men they hardly know on a regular basis. "At the end of the day, we're having intimate experiences with someone we just don't know that well." We are? Wish somebody would have told me.
"He's just not that into you if he's not having sex with you." This book glosses over the guy who is willing to wait for her to be ready. Or the guy who is religious and wants to wait until he's married. The guy who is severely ill... or disabled. I guess they're not just a dying breed anymore... according to the author, they're already dead.
And my favorite: "Try to get to know someone as well as you possibly can before you get naked with them." What? But bed hopping is my favorite sport! After all, I'm a girl, and we're all the same, or haven't you heard?
it's good, it's bad, it's just a book
I really enjoyed reading this book. It was a quick light read that was also helpful too. Not that you should take every single word for the absolute trueth, but keeping in mind the general ideas it gives is a good idea. I highly recomend it. Just remember to keep an open mind and to not abandon your morals and instincts just because of what a book says.