Boilerman, A Deweyville Church Secretary Novel

You’re running for your life in the woods, being chased by a crazed Russian mobster with an uzi. FBI agents are threatening to cut off Mr. Robinson’s fingers, coonhounds want your bacon, and an opossum stares you down. Terror awakes you to a cold sweat. The screams were yours, but the horror was a nightmare. For Jackie McGrath, the secretary for the First United Methodist Church of Deweyville, these scenarios aren’t bad dreams.

If Jackie had time to worry, she would have reason. A wedding video of the bride’s water breaking, the arrest of Gospel Bob of Religion Within Reach for illegal trafficking, and the arrival of the preacher’s slutty wife are just the warm up acts. There’s a shoot-out at the funeral home where Jackie works part-time as a sitter, and a ride-along with the chief of police to a disturbance of the peace at a Boudoir Blast party. The fun isn’t over: Jackie’s prissy, rich sister from New York inserts herself into church business; the weird characters at her church are off their meds; and a curvaceous stranger named Zoya shows up looking for her missing stuffed cupcake. The cupcake turns out to be Rusty Jackson, Jackie’s Boilerman boyfriend, an HVAC professional and retired Navy SEAL who occasionally goes undercover—it’s the under the covers notion that vexes Jackie.

When Rusty is called upon to end a drug cartel’s hostage situation off the coast of Malibu, he leaves Jackie to deal with the new preacher, the beguiling and possibly shady Rev. Jake Brannigan. Brannigan has established a new age agenda, shaking things up with the staid parishioners and creating groupies of the female demographic. Meanwhile, Zoya’s mobster brother blows up Jackie’s house, and Jackie is forced to take her teenage son to Rusty’s cabin in the woods. Bullwinkle, Boris, and Igor follow. Keeping her family from getting caught in crossfire requires a lot of moxie, but Jackie proves she is a woman to be reckoned with.

Although Jackie is fully capable of commandeering an army truck and maneuvering her PT Cruiser, she occasionally takes shot-gun in Rusty’s Dodge Ram truck. And when the time is right, the Boilerman eases Jackie’s tension with a tune-up. His tools include a caftan and a Zil—you’ll have to read the third book in the Deweyville Church Secretary series to find out what a Zil is.

Frankie and Johnnie warn you: Jackie McGrath and her friends will keep you entertained and guessing what can possibly happen next in this zany, naughty, and slightly irreverent romp. If your sides don’t hitch with laughter, there’s something seriously wrong with you.