In the first book to focus on the traumatic effects caused by cliques in our schools, an acclaimed parenting-advice team offers a fresh perspective and an innovative eight-step program to turn around the culture of cruelty that torments all students.
There have always been "in crowds," but today's social pressures force children into explosive, destructive, and even life-threatening situations. No matter what role your child plays in this schoolhouse drama--clique leader, victim, or innocent bystander--this book is a must-read. Giannetti and Sagarese have honed in on this little-understood phenomenon and come up with insights that parents can use immediately. Read Cliques to understand:
* Who the clique leaders are in your child's school
* What you can do NOW to help your child avoid abuse
* Times during the day when cliques are visible to adults
* Where in your school you should start to lobby for change
* Why your "innocent bystander" may not be so innocent
* How you can rid your child of bully-like behavior
Cliques is more than just a manual for cheering your child on--it brings hope and a truly comprehensive understanding of adolescent society to the millions of families struggling against this divisive force. Within its pages, you will find the tools you need to make a difference.
The authors of The Roller Coaster Years, which PW named one of the Best Books of 1997, and Parenting 911 examine the subtle but powerful influence that peer pressure, most notably in the form of cliques, can have on children, generally starting during the middle school years (when kids are between the ages of 10 and 15), and offer parents effective aids to helping their kids--whether they are bullies, victims or observers--manage the larger world of friendships and associations beyond their family at a time when they are also wrestling with issues of self-identity and self-worth. Among the authors' suggestions are "help your child develop... an objective view of cliques" and "help your child control emotions," but, they caution, there are certain things, such as "prevent others from judging your child," that are beyond parents' scope of control or influence. "Cliques deal in social power," aver Giannetti and Sagarese, and even those kids who are considered popular suffer from insecurities about whether or not they'll continue to fit in. In fact, Giannetti and Sagarese have found that kids in "middle friendship circles" (the clique into which most kids fall), who are neither competing for popularity nor are antisocial loners, are usually the happiest. Once again, Giannetti and Sagarese deliver a positive, proactive book for parents that offers cogent (often anecdotal) examples of particular problems that occur with social interaction among middle schoolers and presents effective strategies for handling them. Cliques can be a serious problem, but keeping things in perspective is helpful all the way around.