Getting to Zero
How to Work Through Conflict in Your High-Stakes Relationships
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4.7 • 10 Ratings
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- $12.99
Publisher Description
THE WALL STREET JOURNAL BESTSELLER
Relationship teacher, coach, and founder of The Relationship School Jayson Gaddis reveals the origins of conflict styles, how to stop avoiding difficult conversations, and how to resolve conflict in our most important relationships.
Conflicts in our closest relationships are scary because so much is at stake. If the conflict doesn't go well, we could lose our marriage, our family or our job, all connected to our security and survival. So we do just about anything not to lose those relationships, including avoid conflict, betraying ourselves or becoming dishonest. Unresolved conflict affects every single aspect of our lives, from self-confidence to physical and mental health.
Jayson Gaddis is a personal trainer for relationships and one of the world’s leading authorities on interpersonal conflict. For almost two decades, Gaddis has helped individuals, couples, and teams get to the bottom of their deepest conflicts. He helps people see the wisdom in conflict and how to get to zero—which means we have successfully worked through our conflict and have nothing in the way of a good connection.
In Getting to Zero, Gaddis shows the reader how to stop running away from uncomfortable conversations and instead learn how to work through them. Through funny personal stories, uncomfortable examples, and effective tools and skills, he shows the reader how to move from disconnection to connection, acceptance, and understanding. This method upgrades the old tired and static conflict resolution approaches and offers a fresh, street-level, user-friendly road map on exactly how to work through conflict with the people you care most about.
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
Counselor Gaddis (The Smart Couple Quote Book) presents information from his work with the Relationship School, a consultancy for helping individuals and businesses develop stronger interpersonal relationships, about the nature and value of conflict to keep relationships healthy. Conflict is not limited to big fights and shouting matches, Gaddis writes, before exploring low-level discomforts which "are much more subtle and nuanced." His goal is to help readers understand how to "get to zero" in conflicts—which is an understanding that resolution can only come through reconnecting with others and ourselves. Gaddis first advises readers to move from feeling like a victim to being the "author" in their own life by redirecting memories and stories one tells themselves about the past—experiences that inform how one react to others, even in situations that do not involve trauma or extreme stress. Gaddis then provides steps for managing triggers (such as breathing exercises), being a good listener, and when and how to respond to contentious people or situations. Gaddis's solid groundwork will help anyone who fears conflict or wants their relationships to gain depth and intimacy.
Customer Reviews
Great book about the conflict
Easy read, yet makes you think. Read it if you want to understand yourself (and people around) better