Hey Son, It’s Ok To Not Be Ok

Every man faces struggles, but few talk about it, especially with their sons.

Afraid to appear weak or vulnerable, fathers tend to keep their fears and uncertainties bottled up inside while projecting an image of strength and resilience. Meanwhile, they secretly self-medicate in all sorts of ways— alcohol, food, affairs, and gambling—with many of them inadvertently blowing up their marriage, their family, and even their career in the process. At a certain point, every father who is living such a life needs to ask himself a key question: what sort of legacy is this emotionally stunted approach to life leaving for his son? If fathers don’t teach their sons how to deal with their feelings, who will? And if fathers don’t take the time required to find emotional healing and positive coping skills for themselves, how can they help their boys when trouble strikes?

Jeff Johnson found himself in exactly this situation when he was in his early forties. The president of a thriving family-owned company, by all outward appearances, he was a success. But inside, he was dying due to issues with depression, anxiety and ruminating. Jeff found himself unable to express how he was feeling, choosing to self-medicate, be dishonest, shut down and being unavailable emotionally. Sensing things were reaching a breaking point, he finally found the courage to come clean about what was going on. The result was a watershed of healing, forgiveness, and hope as he worked through his depression and dealt with his grief over how his hidden emotional struggles impacted his relationships with his wife and children.

This book is the result of Jeff’s healing process. Though he doesn’t claim to be an expert, he offers his story and what he’s learned along the way to encourage and equip other fathers to deal with their emotional struggles in a positive way. Most importantly, he encourages fathers to share their story— their entire story, the good, the bad, and the ugly—with their sons to reassure them that it’s okay to admit they’re struggling. In fact, the worst thing they can do is try to hide it.