In the classic bestseller His Needs, Her Needs, Willard F. Harley, Jr., identifies the ten most vital needs of men and women and shows husbands and wives how to satisfy those needs in their spouses. He provides guidance for becoming irresistible to your spouse and for loving more creatively and sensitively, thereby eliminating the problems that often lead to extramarital affairs.
This revised and expanded edition has been updated throughout and includes new writing that highlights the special significance of intimate emotional needs in marriage.
Customer ReviewsSee All
Seeing the obvious
While I enjoyed reading this book that my spouse purchased and suggested that we read, the principles in it were rather obvious and yet somehow weren't currently being put into practice in our marriage. It is easy to use the book as a weapon against a spouse by pointing out how he/she is failing you, but the author wisely warns against doing so.
Some of the needs won't completely fit you and some license will be needed to redefine the need to your situation. The author readily admits that the listed needs are not a one-size-fits-all solution or that they belong to a specific gender, so keep that in mind.
For this book to work, both spouses have to read it with a nonjudgmental attitude and make an honest evaluation of what truly makes them happy. Once the needs are on the table an honest effort is required to meet them, which can be especially trying if you can't see the need expressed by your spouse or feel it is not your job to meet that need. It's a tall order to follow through the author's prescribed plan when your marriage is flying through rough air, but as the book reminds us, we were meeting our spouse's needs at some point in the relationship and we just need to reacquaint ourselves with them again.
Although we're just at the evaluation phase of our needs, I'm hopeful we can put away the selfish blame game and work to meet each other's needs. Time will tell.
I recommend this book to at least break the ice on resolving martial discontent, but it would be of little value if both spouses aren't willing to be open and honest in their thoughts and motivated to make every effort to meet the needs of their spouse.
His Needs, Her Needs.....Everyone Needs this book.
Great book...wish I would have got this book 17+ years ago when I got married. Read now...it can save and blossom your marriage that will last a lifetime. Wish someone would have told me about his book a 6 months ago....would have saved my marriage.
we couldn't have come across this book at a better time. Our marriage was in shambles, we were living as roommates instead of partners, and divorce was coming fast! But this book has opened our eyes and given us tools to rebuild the love and relationship! It will take time, but at least now we have hope. Thanks for writing such a straight forward, in your face, look in the mirror kind of book! It's a 10/10 in my opinion!