I Don't Believe We've Met

How does a person with essentially no friends in real life amass hundreds of viral friends on Twitter and Facebook? Basically, by telling it like it is and saying what needs to be said. And, as always, incorporate sex whenever possible.
Here then, one disgruntled loners crusade to see how many others he can actually amass as friends through the two most popular social networking sites currently the rage in this, the era of interpersonal demise of the Homo sapien.
He started at zero friends using an assumed moniker of Eman Lluf (what it lacked in creativity it made up for with Balkan mystique). Between the two me-centric cyber outposts, Eman Lluf garnered over 2,400 of these seemingly coveted social networking relationships simply by churning out random hyperbole on par with the journal musings of a mental patient. In the spirit of full disclosure, at some point he became a she, but no one really questioned the metamorphisis. In fact, in this day and age, its almost expected.
Crude? Perhaps. Sophomoric? Almost a certainty. Welcome to literature in the 21st Century. And while 2,400 or so might not seem like a grand number to an adolescent who takes on more superficial social networking friends than she takes breaths in a month, or to the Ashton Kutchers of the world, its a pretty respectable number granted Eman Lluf doesnt really exist at all.