Are you confused or hurt by your mother?
Is your relationship less than satisfying, or even hurtful? Are you afraid of, or intimidated by her? If so, you can learn how to heal the emotional pain and take back your personal power. Let author Diane Metcalf, survivor of narcissistic abuse syndrome, show you how.
For as long as I can remember, there was something “different” about my mother. She wasn’t like other mothers.
By the time I was in middle school, I’d met a lot of moms, and I’d witnessed their interactions with their kids. My mom didn’t act like them; she didn’t relate to me the way they did with their kids. She didn’t hug or kiss me. She didn’t smile at, spend time with, or play with me. She didn’t seem happy to see me. She didn’t ask about my school day, and she wasn’t interested in knowing my friends. She seemed to have no interest in me or anything that I did.
No boundaries, name-calling, invalidation, neglect
I stayed up as late as I wanted. I was expected to care for my younger siblings, and was blamed and sometimes punished for their misbehavior.
I was not allowed to openly express feelings, ask questions, or show initiative or curiosity. My feelings were discounted, minimized or invalidated. Asking questions or taking action meant I was challenging mother, and that was not tolerated. She re-wrote my memories and I was expected to believe her version. I was to obey, stay quiet and not question.
My mom called me hurtful names and obscenities, and at times she ignored me, not speaking to me for days, weeks, even months at a time.
I call these kinds of mothers "lemon moms." They parent mainly by manipulating, guilting, shaming, blaming, humiliating and/or belittling. They lack the ability to properly bond with and emotionally nurture their children. The children grow up feeling “not good enough,” unloved, misunderstood, unimportant, and like they don't really matter.
In dysfunctional families, there’s an unspoken rule: don’t talk, don’t trust, don’t feel. As an adult, I was done living by those rules. I started an ongoing journey to find healing and peace.
If any part of this sounds familiar, you are not alone. If there’s a pattern of manipulation, power struggles, or cruelty in your relationship, this book can help. If you find yourself second-guessing your memory, doubting your judgment or sanity, or you’re continually seeking your mother’s withheld affection, attention, or approval, this book can explain why.
Your mother doesn’t need a formal “diagnosis” for you to determine that your relationship is unhealthy. If it is, you can do something about it.
Until now, you had two choices: live on her terms (focusing on her, chasing after her withheld love and acceptance) or go “no contact.” I suggest that you have a third option: allow me to walk with you through the chaos and confusion that is maternal narcissism. I’ll show you how to decode the crazy-making behavior, and take back your personal power.
You’ll learn about:
-identifying complex trauma symptoms
-stopping the gas lighting
-reducing symptoms of complex ptsd
-removing drama from interactions
-setting enforceable boundaries
-identifying and shutting down manipulative attempts
-planning conversations that flow the way you want
-reduce cognitive dissonance
You can use the end-of-chapter "Action Steps" to gain insight or use the Lemon Moms Companion Workbook to enhance your experience.
What’s stopping you? Take back your life! Get this book today!
If your mother is a narcissist buy this book ASAP!
It’s as if she wrote this book about me. Just what I needed in one of the toughest times of my life. Thank you for pulling me out of a dark place and bringing to light so many things I would have never realized on my own.