I'm Not Stupid, I Just..‪.‬

This book is written as a testament to how God delivered me from daddy issues, two abusive marriages, severe depression (among a litany of other things), and how God’s deliverance has allowed me to come out with my hands raised in victory.

After 22 years in a marriage riddled with pain, infidelity, neglect, physical, mental, financial, and emotional abuse, I finally had all I could take! So, early one September morning in 2016, I cried out to God in severe anguish, pleading with him to deliver me from my distress. I wanted him to remove the person who I felt was causing me so much pain. But God gut-checked me by responding, “No. Do what I have given you the ability to do…step out on faith.” I was completely devastated by God’s response, or lack thereof. It was a “no” that I didn’t realize was meant to make me grow. Nevertheless, God soon revealed that I was the reason for me still being in my more than two decades old mess. Yes, I was scared. It was fear that ushered me into paralysis and held me stagnated for years—a fear that will make even the best of us stay in a painful mess even though our inner man longs to be set free. However, fear was the very factor that prevented God from intervening on my behalf. God is not moved by fear; he is moved by faith. I should have been positioned in faith and not in fear. But God is both Alpha and Omega and knew all along what he was doing. I was the one who had to catch up.