Keeping Your Child in Mind
Overcoming Defiance, Tantrums, and Other Everyday Behavior Problems by Seeing the World through Your
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- $8.99
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- $8.99
Publisher Description
Being understood by someone you love is one of the most powerful feelings, at all ages. For a young child, it is the most important of all experiences because it allows the child's mind and sense of self to grow. In the midst of the perennial concerns parents bring to Dr. Claudia Gold, she shows the magical effect of seeing a problem from their child's point of view. Most parenting books teach parents what to do to solve behavior problems, but Dr. Gold shows parents how to be with a child. Crises are defused when children feel truly heard and validated; this is how they learn to understand, and, eventually, control themselves.
Dr. Gold's insightful guide uses new research in developmental psychology and vivid stories from her practice to show parents how to keep a child in mind and deepen this central relationship in their lives.
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
Gold, a behavioral pediatrician in Great Barrington, Mass., and Boston Globe columnist on children's mental health, focuses not on what to do but "how to be" with a child. Gold guides parents to "hold the child in mind," which means that the parent strives to understand the child's behavior in terms of the child's level of development, empathizes with the child's feelings, and helps the child to contain and regulate his or her emotions. It's also crucial that the parent remain calm and not become overwhelmed. Gold covers a range of issues from birth to adolescence, using vignettes and composites culled from her own practice to illustrate how holding a child in mind works (when faced with a colicky baby, Gold encourages parents to tolerate, contain, and be with the baby's distress). She addresses helping a baby learn how to sleep on its own, covers limit-setting for toddlers, and reveals how to use empathy in dealing with teenagers. Rather than behavior problems that need to be fixed, the author approaches such issues as excessive crying, sleep problems, and explosive behavior from a developmental perspective. She also helps parents examine past experiences and change negative family patterns that can be passed from generation to generation. Though not a quick fix, readers seeking a comprehensive approach to child-rearing will welcome this thoughtful book.
