Not Dead, Not Living

Not Dead, Not Living is a deeply introspective and emotionally raw poetry collection that explores themes of depression, loneliness, unrequited love, and existential despair. Through a series of poems, the author captures the struggle of feeling trapped between life and death—too strong to die but too weak to truly live.

The poems delve into persistent depressive disorder, questioning the purpose of existence, and the pain of feeling rejected by both people and God's community. The collection also reflects on faith, longing for heaven as a place of ultimate freedom, and the paradox of hope—both a source of endurance and disappointment. Despite the darkness, the poems acknowledge the sustaining presence of God, the longing for love, and the search for meaning in a world that often feels dull and empty.