Papyrus of the Pillow

Luca is diagnosed with schizo-feria as he likes to call it, and later described as co-morbid personality ,During his first so-called- brain-breakdown, I described what I heard, saw and felt, as pixilation energy and began to sense spiritual activity, living as a kind of modern-day hermetic, sketching stones and placing them in the weedy garden in Bromley common. Yet much later after moving to Thanet, the strangest voice I ever had was when I heard a latching deep pitch and a minotaur with horns in the form of a Prussian black shadow, and I had to look up in the dictionary to decipher the meaning of the sentence, in the Hailey hotel in Herne bay, it said ‘you are a prefect of the devil’ and then I found out that prefect meant like a schooling, but I twisted it out of fear that it meant I could leave the human-class of egoism anytime without following any darkness.

I guess any darkness I ever used was kind of a shock-reactive act when ill, I kind of sensitivity, that I am a soaker of all the ecstasies and negatives of life, mainly paranoiac reactions in the past lead me to confinement in hospital and by non-confidence, and collective voices.

I joined up with the theosophical society of English in Holborn in 2002 or 3, where I went to a book opening and purchased a copy of the esoteric science by Rudolf Steiner. My opinion from it is that every religion is a path to the same door, and that karma exists, and all religious texts are like riddles to the ultimate Buddhist-like truth that we merely reincarnate genetically and spiritual, advancing throughout lives, and then when perfected, we reach a god-like decision. Spiritual evolution, and I know-this, this is why I do not follow any particular region of the esoteric; I call it the study or realisation off essence-hood, the totality of all. And creativity is its instrument, like protein or Thai-chi for the soul.

When I where sectioned fasted, at first, but then the medication had always been a problem until I found one with the least amount of side effects that didn’t make me weight-gain, a little empty, but I battled that. In this book I have included poems, that are symbolic yet sensational for me, and if I believe they are deeply rooted in ageless thinking or my creative struggle.