Rude Bitches Make Me Tired
Slightly Profane and Entirely Logical Answers to Modern Etiquette Dilemmas
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4.0 • 24 Ratings
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- $11.99
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- $11.99
Publisher Description
Tired of Rude Bitches? This Wickedly Funny Etiquette Manual is for You!
In Rude Bitches Make Me Tired, Celia Rivenbark tackles modern-day manners with her signature blend of wit, wisdom, and mild profanity. From dealing with braggy playground moms to the etiquette of sex in your aunt's bed on vacation, Rivenbark offers hilarious insights into the social conundrums of our time.
Discover the dos and don'ts of:
Check splitting ("Who had the gorgonzola crumbles and should we really care?")
Airline travel (beware the "Recline Monster" and other pesky creatures)
The art of the visit (always leave them wanting more...much more)
Gym and locker room etiquette (no one wants to talk to you while you're buck naked)
Office manners ("Loud talkers, cake hawkers, and Britney Sue's unfortunate cyst")
Packed with satirical humor and relatable anecdotes, this etiquette guide is a must-read for anyone navigating the complexities of modern manners. Rivenbark's sharp observations and threadbare advice will have you laughing out loud while learning how to handle life's most awkward situations with grace (or at least with a good comeback).
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
Southern humorist Rivenbark applies her trademark wit to answering modern-day dilemmas of etiquette in what is decidedly "not your mama's etiquette guide." She addresses everything from table manners in a section titled "That's Not a Salad Fork, You Stupid Bitch" to dealing with pushy, bragging moms or, even worse, moms who refuse to vaccinate their children. Rivenbark grapples with important issues like discord between married Duke and North Carolina basketball fans; the office co-worker running a "cake scam"; and "unsolicited hugging." She decries etiquette degenerates like air travel's "Entitled Recline Monster"; a woman so devoted to her politics she campaigns at funerals; and the slow-moving grocery store shoppers she dubs Saunteringus malingerus. Further topics include restroom etiquette, where Rivenbark advises men to "not tap your toes in a stall," as "such behavior could turn you into a Republican congressman"; dealing with rude or lousy drivers on the road; and even proper Facebook behavior. As usual, her comments are infused with a Southern flair, be it a recipe for bourbon-soaked baked ham, the "Sunday-afternoon drop-in," or prefacing awful comments with "bless her heart." Fans of Rivenbark's biting humor will not be disappointed with this latest offering.
