I crawled into Ryan Jensen's bed that first night by accident.
I barely knew him. I thought it was his sister's bed—her room. It took seconds to realize my error, and I should've left...
I didn't. I didn't jump out. I didn't get embarrassed.
And that night, in that moment, it was the only thing I craved.
I asked to stay. He let me, and I slept.
The truth? I never wanted to leave his bed. If I could've stayed forever, I would have.
He became my sanctuary.
Because—four hours earlier—my twin sister killed herself.
** Standalone full-length novel, Mature YA themes
Customer ReviewsSee All
This was a pretty good book and I thought the way that the author wrote the ending was unexpected in my opinion. I was so surprised about the ending but I really enjoyed it!
Beautiful, Tragic Story
The cover had me curious. It portrayed a book full of emotion and lured me in to find out what happened to this girl to lead to her body language in the cover photograph. When I started reading, I was pulled in by the allure of mystery. This book is truly amazing at hooking the reader with curiosity. I was constantly wondering what I didn’t know by the way it was written. This book is certainly intriguing and disturbing to me as a reader. I don’t think I could say that it alienated, irritated, or frightened me. Maybe some irritation with the way that high school aged girls sometimes act. This book is full of feels and is sure to draw other readers in from the beginning much like me. This story was told very well. It is raw emotion. I am certain it would be very difficult to write a book on this subject matter and accomplish the feat of writing the situation with the perfect balance. As an individual with a rare cancer and who will never know the words NED (no evidence of disease), I struggle with my imminent death and those close to me know I am quite blunt regarding the subject of my cancer and my death. While I know my situation is completely different than the situation in the book, I tell you this to say that I loved how the main character, Mackenzie, copes with her difficult situation and find myself relating to her internal sarcasm and blunt banter with her sister. I have not read other books by Tijan, but I will be putting them on my to be read. I am impressed with Tijan’s writing style and ability to write about difficult situations. I think Amy can speak more to the difference between this book and others written by Tijan, as she was the one who suggested we review this book. So many of my questions for the author were addressed in the “Dear Reader” section at the close of the book. There are so many beautiful answers to my questions there and it leaves me with only one question left to ask in relation to this book. The power of perspective is so intense and completely changes a story. Another character could tell this story and elicit completely different feelings from readers. If you had to choose a different character perspective to tell this story from who would you choose and why? I can say with confidence in my ignorance, I did not see the ending coming. This book kept my interest throughout, as I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop. There was something lurking around the corner and I could not have prepared for it. I enjoy reading books without a pretty wrapped package where everything works out perfectly and the ending has a bow slapped on it. The ending was shocking for me and it didn’t make me feel like it was wrapped up neatly. I still had so many questions, but will not go forward agonizing over the unanswered questions at the back of my mind. There was some resolution in at least having the information I did by the end of the book and many of the questions I had throughout were answered, even if I was left with more.
Reading this book took me on a tailspin. I cried with her, I laughed with her, and I felt the destruction that she tried not to cause. She experiences a loss that many people wouldn’t have been able to come back from. And she mentally checks out while all these different things are going on around her to destroy her. And in the midst of her grieving she meets this guy who understands the pain she has been feeling. He understands it better than she thinks and he is the one that she opens up to. And of course he just has to be popular so add in the mean girl and it sounds like a typical high school drama. But this book is so much more than typical. It will break your heart and then in the end you will be put back whole. This book is tragic, love, death, romance, and acceptance all in one. You will literally feel where she is coming from with every choice that she makes. And you will understand that although she’s in high school she is grieving and she is looking for acceptance. If i could rate this book higher than a 5 I would because it was that powerfully good.