Sick of porn? Time to detox. A huge percentage of men need a porn detox, a moral and psychological reset. Do you? If so, whether you know it or not, pornography has corrupted your thinking, weakened your conscience, warped your sense of right and wrong, and twisted your understanding and expectations of sexuality. You need a reset by the One who created sex. In this book, I hope to help you reorient your understanding of sex, both in the big picture and in the act itself, according to God's plan for this great gift. I want to help you detox from all the junk you've seen, all the lies you've believed. This is not an easy process. It is rarely a quick process. It involves a letting go of old realities and an embrace of a new normal. To be willing to go through it you need to see how bad your current situation really is, and how the path you are on leads no place good. You need to see that the path of porn leads only to more isolation, guilt, alienation, and pain. Whether single or married, such a reset to normal is the only thing that can ever equip you to become a pure, loving, attentive, sacrificial husband. But you already know you need to change. Few Christian men indulge in porn without realizing they need to quit. Every Christian guy who looks at porn wants to stop, but many of us want to stop just a little bit less than we want to keep going. The problem isn't knowledge-it's desire and ability. So sin prevails. Here's a promise. You'll never stop until you begin to see the monstrous nature of the sin you're committing. You'll never stop until the sin is more horrifying to you than the commission of the sin is enjoyable. You'll need to hate that sin before you can find freedom from it. That means you need more grace. You need to cry out to be changed and to see the monstrous nature of this sin. And then you need to behave in faith that God will meet you with grace as you act to cut off the porn and begin the reset. -Tim Challies
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Tim Challies does a great job of describing the sexual intimacy that is intended by God in the Bible. His writing style communicates with all men. I will begin recommending this book in my ministry to men.
Good assessment, weak theology
Challies’ assessment of the impact of pornography on marriage is spot on. It is truly catastrophic and epidemic. His argument that pleasuring oneself has no place in a Christian’s life is also convincing. Had he ended there, this book would have been worth the read.
However, to argue that God commands Christian husbands and wives to have sex and to have it frequently as an act of obedience simply lacks support in scripture. His primary proof text is 1 Cor. 17:5, but he ignores the rest of the passage. To suggest that Paul’s concern was that Christian couples have more sex, rather than exercise self-control is laughable. His letter to the Galatians make it clear where Paul places priority.
Most concerning, though, is Challies’ idea that sexual desire is from God. Sexual desire is when the mind and body want sex. Desire is, by definition, selfish. This is the root of the problem of sexual sin. To propose that God built selfishness into us is a denial of God’s very nature.
Challies encourages men to devote themselves to prayer, scripture and accountability to overcome the chains of sexual sin. I agree. But it has to be rooted in a correct understanding of God’s nature and our own selfishness. Ultimately, selfishness is the poison that kills a marriage.
This book is a must read for any and ALL men. The reason I say this is because there is not one male human being who hasn't battled sexual sin. This is such a great writing and it makes you want to keep reading. It doesn't just tell you to stop watching pornography it tells you what the consequences are from doing it, some you may not realize until you are married, but also what it is doing to you and how it changes your view of what a woman of God truly is. God bless.