Shad Roe

A violent, abusive, alcoholic father dies a slow death. When the end finally arrives, the youngest son begins the process of searching for peace. He was sure it would come when his old man died. Traveling to his father's funeral, the son imagines that it will only be himself and his two older siblings in attendance. After all, who would mourn the death of a human being who brought such suffering to the lives of so many? Arriving at the funeral home, though, the author is surprised at the size of the crowd in attendance at his father's visitation.


As one old acquaintance after another greets the returning son, the author examines the many faces that represent lives left in chaos by the man he called his father. Seeking his own deliverance from the memories that still scar him, Randy peels back the scabs covering excruciating and paralyzing pain. Each face triggers a recall of an episode from a past divided into two worlds: the world of normalcy that Randy craved and sometimes escaped to, and the world where alcoholism and madness turned deadly in an instant. Darker paths of escape emerged as the tortured boy joined his friends reveling in the torture of animals, chopping and hacking away at living creatures just to watch them die. In the midst of his mother's silent seduction, the author also learned that men sometimes kill not only animals, but their wives as well.


As the book concludes, Randy wonders if suicide is the only means of escaping the pain of his life. He also begins to realize that redemption and forgiveness may forever be elusive--if not impossible--even for those most determined to embrace them. Redemption lies in the recognition that, in too many ways, we are our parents' children. While we may suffer under their example when we are young, we can either become them as we grow old or choose to leave a legacy of our own.