Tending

“A beautiful and honest reflection on caregiving in all its rewards and complexity. Katherine May gives voice to the array of emotions so many caregivers experience but often feel unable to say out loud.” — Emma Heming Willis, New York Times bestselling author of The Unexpected Journey

From the New York Times bestselling author of Wintering and Enchantment, a radical reimagining of care: the work we resist and resent, but the thread that binds us together

When her husband falls seriously ill, Katherine May finds herself thrown into the world of multigenerational care, trying to hold together home and family as they spin determinedly apart. Drawn into an endless cycle of domestic and emotional work, she is plagued by spiders, the subject of a lifelong phobia. And yet, in this new era of her life, the spiders now seem to mirror her own labors as she sees them endlessly reweaving their fraying homes, constantly alert to danger through the vibrations of their webs.

Drawing on art, mythology, philosophy and the natural world, Tending is a meditation on what it means to give - and receive - care. Sharply-observed, funny, and tender, it captures the granularity of care, its hardships and its moments of transcendence. “We tend to think, now, that life is what happens in-between, and that care is somehow an anomaly, a mistake,” writes May. “Instead, it is perhaps the most intrinsic part of our humanity. We resent and fear it, but it flows from us, unbidden.”

Achingly human, and with one foot always in the wild, Tending is a timely exploration of connection, mortality, and how our duties of care shift radically in midlife. It gives caregivers a visceral visibility, and asks how we can learn to see that unsung work as the beating heart of our survival.