The Accidental Vampire
An Argeneau Novel
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4.6 • 241 Ratings
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- $8.99
Publisher Description
Ever since an accident turned her into a knockout vamp, Elvi Black's been catching her z's in a coffin, staying out of the sun, and giving up garlic. She knows there's more to being undead than what she saw in Dracula, but she can't very well ask her mortal friends about proper biting etiquette. But when her neighbors placed a personal ad for her in the local paper, she never imagined she'd meet Victor Argeneau, a vampire who could have his pick of any woman—dead or alive.
Rich, powerful, and drop—dead gorgeous, Victor's the perfect man for a novice neck—biter like Elvi. He's willing to teach her everything he knows, but he'll have to do it fast. Someone's out to put a stake through her new vamp life, and only Victor can keep her safe—and satisfied—for all eternity.
Customer Reviews
Great
This is a must read. Great story and people.
Just no
Look, I like the vampire characters well enough and the romance is fine, but I can’t deal with the stupid. It crosses totally from “oh what a quirky, charming town” to a situation that is so completely absurd and unbelievable that I couldn’t keep myself in the story. I’m suspending my disbelief over VAMPIRES FROM ATLANTIS, but to make the lead female character Elvi such a stone cold idiot is too much. All I wanted to do was scream at her, and the townsfolk.
**** SPOILERS AHEAD ****
MAJOR SPOILER
Some of them try to kill Elvi and she’s totally cool with it. Like beyond okay with her neighbors misunderstanding a situation and escalating it to MURDER. She’s far, far too trusting and her naïveté is meant to be charming. It is not, it is infuriating. As are the attitudes of the “whoops, glad we didn’t kill you since I’m sure our next neighbors would’ve sucked compared to you” psychopaths next door. I have read other books in this series, gave it a good chance because I wanted to have a new series to sink my teeth into, but this will probably be my last book from Sands. Her characters are just too unrealistic and that’s saying a lot. No one is that nice and understanding of others all the time. It’s like in order for her readers to like her characters Sands thinks they must be toothless, beatific creatures that never feel negative emotions for more than a second or any sense of self-preservation. It’s not a feel good story that doesn’t go too deep, which could be forgiven for a lack of emotional depth, but one in which a characters wife is mentioned and what we know about her is name was Marion and that she was BURNED ALIVE. If you want me to care about a characters sad backstory you have to make their inner monologue more interesting. Everyone in this book whose inner thoughts you hear speaks in the same way, they are not different, they are boring. It’s hard to think that a book series with a backstory that includes a mythical city and its vampire descendants could be this boring, but it is, and that’s really unforgivable.
Ha ha
The quirkiness of the cheesecake run and then the bed run, are really too funny. These fictional characters with superior skills yet crazy little quirks really do make these books good reading. Can't wait for the September 2013 book. Love my new vocab...slagging is my new favorite word.