Three Men in a Boat

A joke might be just the thing you need. Here it goes: “Three men climb into a boat: Jerome, K, Jerome.”

Ha, ha. Very funny.

Just that the above book, that you must have surely identified as a well-known comic piece of writing, is no joke at all, but a” heavyweight-in-featherly-disguise” novel and one so charming as to have become an ageless favourite of all the black English humour aficionados. As everybody knows, a comedy—be it in writing or not—is a serious and hard to pull off genre and in order to succeed in creating a genuine one, one must take it very seriously. So did Jerome K. Jerome, an English writer and humourist, who wrote novels, short stories and plays and who served, during the Great War, as an ambulance driver for the French Army, as his age (56) didn’t allow him, back then, at the outbreak of the war, to be enrolled in the British Army. Apparently, humour ran in his family, as his father’s name was Jerome Clapp Jerome, his sisters formed the charming couple known as Paulina and Blandina and his very own initial K. came from…Klapka. But, hey, what’s in a name and who are we to fudge? Sorry, we meant judge, but let’s not trudge.

Anyway, if you’ve ever spent at least one quiet evening with your friends discussing illnesses you have ever fancied to suffer from, you will no doubt love the story immediately. If not, you must be a declared workaholic and it’s hard time you snatched a book (this one!) and took some time off for a good ol’session of (out loud) laughing (L.O.L read backwards still gives L.O.L. – L.O.L!).

The three men in the book conclude—just like you at this very moment—that they suffer from overwork and need a holiday therefore. A boating one, up the River Thames, naturally. There ensues a series of more or less unfortunate events, which you have to read to believe. The river trip in the book has become an all-time classic as well, fans from all over the world re-enacting it , especially since the pubs and inns named therein by the author are still open.

Here are a few short quotes of the said author in order to get your boat(s) floating:

“Let your boat of life be light, packed with only what you need – a homely home and simple pleasures, one or two friends, worth the name, someone to love and someone to love you, a cat, a dog, and a pipe or two, enough to eat and enough to wear, and a little more than enough to drink; for thirst is a dangerous thing.”

“Everything has its drawbacks, as the man said when his mother-in-law died, and they came down upon him for the funeral expenses.”

“What readers ask nowadays in a book is that it should improve, instruct and elevate. This book wouldn’t elevate a cow. I cannot conscientiously recommend it for any useful purposes whatever. All I can suggest is that when you get tired of reading “the best hundred books,” you may take this for half an hour. It will be a change.”

So—Ladies and gentlemen, clap your hands and stomp your feet for the one and only Jerome K. Jerome and prepare to roar with laughter (or smirk with amused condescendence, if you prefer) while reading this little gem. So, hurry up now, don’t you stand there, climb in!

And…to say something of the dog, his name is Montmorency and he still laughs about it, too. Say his name quickly three times in a row and then you’re all set to go to bed. With this book, naturally. You will laugh so hard that your wife/husband/partner/dog/neighbours/whoever-might-be-living-under-your-bed-lately will be able to say that they saw a happy man/woman laughing in their sleep. You! Ha, ha. Very funny.