Understanding our thoughts

The human being has always been dominated … by contradictory thoughts and emotions.
Maybe one of the worst diseases from the history of the world … worst even as cancer … sometimes without any possible treatment is the … doubt.

And is funny, cause the Universe is playing around with us … giving us so, so many contradictory … options.

I am laughing … going back in time and seeing myself in this weird situation of not being able to decide what to do … what to choose.

Today i somehow believe that it’s better to have … no option …. or just one option, cause each time when i had 2 or more options … everything was too complicated.

I had to think too much.

… to meditate on and on and on.

And when i decided i was still overwhelmed by …. doubt.

Instead of being happy for the life i had, i was unhappy …. In fact somehow ruined emotionally and mentally of all what was going on with me.

Everything was sometimes so amplified that i could not … continue the life itself.

The Universe letted me decide what to do … but i was not capable of seeing the path … the real one.

I was hearing into my head all the time … “What to do?! What to decide?! What should be the best?!”

But i did not know what to do … what to decide … and instead of being happy for having so many opportunities … my vibe was always f****d up.

And everything was like that cause i did not know how to close my eyes and connect to myself … asking to my intuition for guidance.

The undecided version of myself, was a result of the fact that i did not know anything about my soul … and how to be in total harmony with this inner self.

I did not know how to listen to all those voices … to my intuition … and keep the right balance between the inner and the outer world.

And instead of being happy and a soul dominated by joy … i was in this silly emotional balance … dominated by a non ending indecision.

I should name it today … the negative amplifier … and all what i want is just get rid of it.

Nothing more.