The Relationship You Want and The Relationship Problems You Don’t
What if you could have a relationship that supports who you are, one that is there for you through thick and thin, rain or sunshine?
What if you had a relationship where you are just happy, so happy to be in, days-in, days-out?
How much better would that make your life?
This is the relationship you want.
The Story of My Unhappy Marriage
A few years ago I had those same things on my mind. What I didn’t have was the relationship I wanted.
I was unhappy in my relationship. I knew there had to be answers to what was ailing our marriage, because my husband was also unhappy.
I turned to all sorts of relationship-related resources - books, CDs, articles. I suggested counseling to my husband. He was absolutely not going to have it.
I was determined to fix my marriage, something in me told me the answers were right there within my reach.
I had this clear notion, of what a really great relationship with my husband should look like.
That of course led to even more frustration. The more I wanted it, the farther away it seemed. Something had to give.
Turning Around My Relationship & Resolving The Critical Problems - The Why Question.
The one thing I noticed with our relationship was the amount of silly arguments that went nowhere; Over and over again.
And that is where I started to unravel the answers. Because what I was doing, what we were doing together was leading us completely in the opposite direction that I wanted my relationship to go. It was crazy!
So I started with one word, one word, one question – Why? And that Why began to peel away the onion AND got me answers. But here is the remarkable thing. The answers are maybe what most of us already know, principles that we have been taught from childhood, but somehow have not applied as adults.
These series of “Whys” led me to examine my own beliefs about intimate relationships, beliefs that have been fed to me by our own cultural narratives around the subject as depicted in our art forms such as movies, plays, books, and even the media.
My Whys led to the writing of a series of 5 books that have given me so much clarity about my own marriage and am sure will give you clarity about your own relationship.
The Insidious Beliefs That Are Sabotaging Your Relationship
What I found is that we have allowed ourselves to subscribe too much to, and be drawn in to the nice-sounding narratives about romantic relationships without stopping to think about our own nature as human beings.
So this is what I found:
5 Beliefs That May Be Causing Your Relationship Problems
Belief #1 - If you really, really want to be happy in your relationship, you have to dispel yourself of this one belief in particular because it robs you of a sense of control.
Belief #2 - There is something about us, all of us, which pretends to be our friend but really is about satisfying itself at our own expense. We believe if it is satisfied then we are also satisfied.. We have to get rid of this one if we are going to find happiness in our relationship.
Belief #3 – Three things we think we can put on hold, but we absolutely shouldn’t.
Belief #4 - I’ll just straight tell you this one. Not seeing the relationship in its proper context.
Belief #5 - We all want security in our relationship, but there is one belief that too many of us harbor that leads to the exact opposite of what we really desire. Get rid of this belief.
The above 5 beliefs, and accompanying solutions, are outlined in this Book 1 of the five-book series. Now you can rid yourself of the beliefs that are draining your relationship.