When Parents Hurt
Compassionate Strategies When You and Your Grown Child Don't Get Along
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- $14.99
Publisher Description
This unique book helps parents work through the pain, shame, and sense of loss that they feel when their relationship with their older or adult children has not turned out as they hoped or expected
Sometimes, despite our best efforts, we lose the opportunity to be the parent we desperately want to be and must mourn the loss of a harmonious relationship with our child. Although this situation may seem hopeless, When Parents Hurt is designed to help us through this intensely difficult situation with compassion and thoughtfulness.
Through healing exercises and case examples, Dr. Joshua Coleman helps parents:
Reduce anger, guilt, and shameLearn how temperament, the teen years, a partner’s or their own mistakes, and divorce can harm the parent-child bondCome to terms with their imperfections, as well as their child’sDevelop strategies for reaching out and for maintaining their self-esteem through trying timesUnderstand how society’s expectations contribute to the risk of parental wounds
By helping parents recognize what they can do—and to let go of what they cannot control—When Parents Hurt helps families develop more positive ways of relating to themselves and each other.
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
Parenting and relationship expert Coleman points out that one can be a devoted parent and still have things run amok. Parents who have made mistakes and those who haven't can both be involved in a hurtful relationship with an older child; Coleman's focus is on helping the parent cope and carry on. In individual chapters, he explores the many reasons why a relationship can falter, examining how divorce, mismatches in child/parent personalities and the demands of a competitive society can adversely affect the child/parent relationship. Using case studies from his psychology practice as well as his own experiences as a divorced father who once faced a difficult time with his eldest daughter, Coleman provides strategies for managing the guilt and regret that can arise in parents as children grow into teens and young adults. He advises parents to take responsibility for their past actions, to make amends, to forgive both themselves and their children, and to move guilt and shame to the background and gratitude to the foreground. By following these "essential principles," Coleman claims, emotionally wounded parents will begin to overcome the pain of relationships gone awry and move on to a more hopeful future. Coleman's personable writing style makes this an engaging read despite the serious subject matter.