"Unflinchingly irreverent, laugh-out-loud funny, and heartbreakingly honest." —Elizabeth Acevedo, National Book Award winner and New York Times bestselling author of The Poet X
In the vein of powerful reads like The Hate U Give and Girl in Pieces, comes poet Morgan Parker's pitch-perfect novel about a black teenage girl searching for her identity when the world around her views her depression as a lack of faith and blackness as something to be politely ignored.
Trapped in sunny, stifling, small-town suburbia, seventeen-year-old Morgan knows why she's in therapy. She can't count the number of times she's been the only non-white person at the sleepover, been teased for her "weird" outfits, and been told she's not "really" black. Also, she's spent most of her summer crying in bed. So there's that, too.
Lately, it feels like the whole world is listening to the same terrible track on repeat--and it's telling them how to feel, who to vote for, what to believe. Morgan wonders, when can she turn this song off and begin living for herself?
Loosely based on her own teenage life and diaries, this incredible debut by award-winning poet Morgan Parker will make readers stand up and cheer for a girl brave enough to live life on her own terms--and for themselves.
"Morgan Parker put THIS song on--and I hope it never turns off." —Nic Stone, New York Times bestselling author of Dear Martin and Odd One Out
“A triumphant first impression in the YA space.” —Entertainment Weekly
“An incredibly heartfelt, deep story about a girl's coming of age.” —Refinery29
In this thoughtful novel set against the backdrop of the 2008 presidential election, Morgan Parker, 17, is a self-proclaimed "super-emo" kid living with anxiety and depression in Southern California. One of the only black kids at her conservative Christian school (a "high school inside a church inside a PacSun"), Morgan regularly experiences racist microaggressions from her teachers and peers, who comment on the music she listens to and the clothes she wears, and how "white" she acts. After a devastating event the previous summer landed her in therapy and on antidepressants, Morgan is determined to "get happy" and learn to love her "intense, ridiculous, passionate, and sometimes hilarious" self and her blackness, whatever it takes. When the election and a project for history class show Morgan how much she doesn't know about black history, she decides to educate herself and her classmates on what it means to be black in America. Drawing on her own teen experiences, Parker (There Are More Beautiful Things Than Beyonc for adults) adroitly touches upon matters of respectability and "presentableness," stigmas against discussing mental health issues in the black community and among young adults, and internalized and societal racism. Ages 12 up.