Shelby's Secret

Shelby
The things I have seen and lived through give me that superior attitude; that I have that right to do what I please when in all actuality I don't have the legal right to do any of it. Still, if I worried about all the illegal things I've done over the years I wouldn't sleep at night. Is it illegal if I don't get caught? That's how I justify it. I'm not the helpless damsel in distress who needs to be rescued. I can hold my own in this man's world. I am a force to be reckoned with. I chose to use my brains instead of my brawn. I am an enigma. I am an extraordinary creature. I won't apologize for who I am. I am me.
I was raised in a world that sees all the ugliness of what individuals can be. I have not been under a rock living in rainbows and fairy tales. I'm not burying my head in a romance novel only to be kicked on my ass when bad shit happens. Planning ahead for the bad shit so when it happens I land on my feet. That's the way my world works. I wish I could be the soft spoken silly girl who looks at the clouds in the sky and dreams a dream of rainbows and butterflies. I look at the clouds as the enemy. An eye in the sky watching my every move. I'm not the sweet girly girl and that's okay with me.
I know Teacher is the one man that will be capable of shredding me to pieces and relinquishing the power I hold inside of me. That is my fear. I hold so many secrets inside of me that they fight to escape the darkness I have cloaked them in. It is a daily struggle and the burden I bear. It is my penance for the choices I have made and the secrets I have kept. That is mine alone to take on. It is one I will gratefully take on, if it means I stay in control of my world.

Teacher
I was seeing the bigger picture clearer with each passing lesson. I was becoming the man I was supposed to be. Whether the world thought I was good or bad didn't matter to me. My club, the brotherhood, my seeds walking the earth. Their opinions were all that mattered to me. Everybody else could go f*** themselves. Even Shelby could climb into her bubble and pretend that she didn't have a part in all of this. Creating the man I am today was partially because of her actions. I don't know what kind of game she thought she was playing with me, but the days of her calling the shots were almost over. Soon enough she wouldn't be calling any shots. I would. Get ready Shelby, I'm coming home.