“This book feels so hopeful because it’s direct, it’s really honest, and it’s so actionable.” —Brene Brown
From New York Times–bestselling authors Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman, a simple yet powerful plan to transform your relationship in seven days
What makes love last? Why does one couple stay together forever, while another falls apart? And most importantly, is there a scientific formula for love?
Drs. John Gottman and Julie Schwartz Gottman are the world’s leading relationship scientists. For the past forty years, they have been studying love. They’ve gathered data on over three thousand couples, looking at everything from their body language to the way they converse to their stress hormone levels. Their goal: to identify the building blocks of love.
The Love Prescription distills their life’s work into a bite-size, seven-day action plan with easy, immediately actionable steps. There will be no grand gestures and no big, hard conversations. There’s nothing to buy or do to prepare. Anyone can do this, from any starting point.
The seven-day prescription will lead you through these exercises:
Day 1: Make Contact
Day 2: Ask a Big Question
Day 3: Say Thank You
Day 4: Give a Real Compliment
Day 5: Ask for What You Need
Day 6: Reach Out and Touch
Day 7: Declare a Date Night
There is a formula for a good relationship, and this book will show you how a few small changes can fundamentally transform your relationship for the better.
Why do some relationships last while others fall apart? ask clinical psychologists John and Julie Schwartz Gottman (Eight Dates) in this penetrating program. The married duo look to the hundreds of relationships they've studied at the University of Washington's Love Lab to determine the predictors of lasting relationships, and contend that "love is all about the small stuff," such as thanking one's partner for making coffee. Laying out a seven-step plan to cultivate "a thriving culture of appreciation between partners," the authors encourage communicating one's needs and making time to connect. The Gottmans describe a couple whose relationship survived the pandemic because they remained curious about each other, leading the authors to recommend asking one's partner such questions as "What are some unfulfilled things in your life?" Research-backed findings bring scientific rigor to the advice, as when the authors detail a study in which they watched participants attempt to resolve an argument and found that those who were still together six years later were the ones who had five positive interactions (such as a smile) for every negative one; to that end, the Gottmans suggest readers compliment their partners often. The astute guidance is straightforward without being obvious, and the authors excel at distilling sharp lessons from client stories. Couples should consider making this enlightening guide required reading.